It’s okay to be a human today.
As you begin to read this post, for just a moment, remember your breath. Remember how strong and soft it is. How it moves and flows with your body, not against it. Breathe.
Think about the last time you took a deep breath. Try to recall a place or a setting that gives you a reason to relax – a place or time when you felt truly at ease in your soul. Breathe.
Hold that thought in your mind. Wrap your whole self around it. What do you see? What does it sound like? What colors bring joy to your heart?
Breathe. Cradle this feeling. Let it sink into your being the way a baby melts into your chest as she slowly falls asleep. Be truly present with this moment.
Breathe in. Hold for a few seconds. Breathe out slowly for as long as you can.
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We know that as humans, we can’t be expected to ride the waves of anxiety with perfect ease, or to turn immediately to our healthiest coping skills, or complete our 5-step self-care skin routines every night.
No. We are human. We feel. We experience life. We get sad. Sometimes we get really, really sad; and sometimes, really, really, angry.
AND IT’S OKAY.
We are human.
Sometimes we GRIEVE.
There are times when we can experience feelings, thoughts, and actions that mirror a grieving process: when a certain dream, hope, relationship, or experience didn’t pan out the way we hoped it would and now we’re left with the pieces of what could have been.
It’s okay to grieve – to wish for things you didn’t know you would be wishing for.
It's okay to grieve and be angry – to be angry about situations you thought would never happen to you.
And it's okay to just sit there on the couch in your blanket and feel whatever you’re feeling right now.
The way your body is responding to change, shift, and grief in our world is okay. AND IT’S NEEDED.
The world needs people who are being honest about what they are feeling during times of uncertainty. The world needs integrity – not only in our actions, but also our emotions and thought processes.
How can we, as communities around the world support one another through these uncertain times? I believe one of the ways (among the many other wonderful ways people have been coming together through these scary times) is to be brutally and tenderly honest with ourselves and what we need.
The resources are available, though they may look different now. They might look really different, and it might be scary to even think about them.
Breathe.
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Take a moment and let yourself feel those things you really miss. Take a moment and give yourself permission to grieve the loss you’ve experienced through all this uncontrollable change. Give unabashed comfort to yourself for getting through the day.
Breathe.
Give yourself permission to be present with yourself.
Breathe in again, and this time from your belly.
Feel the muscles in your abdomen expand as the air fills your lungs and diaphragm.
Breathe out, and feel the hot air exiting your body. Listen for the way your whole self relaxes just a little more. Feel your body shift. Become aware, from your head down to your toes, of your body entirely.
Breathe.
As you take in another breath, remember that you are human, and you just gave your body something it needs: a moment to rest.
Exhale and feel as your body works in tandem with you.
Then, after you’ve given voice to the body that yearned for your care:
If you can muster it, you might be able to hear the birds still singing.
If you can glance over your shoulder, the puppers are still asking us to pat their fluffy heads.
If you look out your window, the clouds are still moving across the blue sky somewhere in our world.
If you look past the news, you’ll see that children never stopped asking us to play with them and join their world of imagination.
If you can invite yourself to see, the plants are still growing in the sunshine through our windows.
If you can take a step outside, the wind is still sending pollen to and fro to make way for another season.
If you can listen a little, babies are still laughing at funny noises.
If you can remember, that perfect street you like to drive down is still there, with it’s hanging tree limbs and old houses.
And if you can laugh with yourself, that long-lost recipe you saved last spring on the Pinterest board entitled, “Really Optimistic” is patiently waiting for you to be brave with your baking skills.
Breathe in once more and speak to yourself the one word that you need to hear today. If you let yourself really ponder, you already know for yourself which word you need to hear.
Above all else, remember to take more moments to be human.
It's okay to be human.
Let yourself be a human today.
And breathe.
Chrisinda Hunter, LMFT